Gospel IX: on transubstantiation

Instead of eating gross wafer bread for the body of christ and drinking watered down, vinegary wine for the blood of christ, Bob has a tastier alternative: the body of bob is weed brownies and chicken fingers and the blood of bob is $7 pitchers of beer. Bob doesn't believe in the religious power being orchestrated into hierarchies, so you don't even need a priest or minister to transubstantiate your brownies/chicken figners/pitchers, you can do it yourself!

On Friday when you are at a bar (a holy place according to Bob) before you ingest and imbibe just mutter the words "tonight will be epic" and just like the Catholics a cannibal you will become.

That is the word of Bob.

~ The Gospel of Minister McGonagle IX 1:26 pm